The Woman in Me by Britney Spears. No Advance Reader Copy included. No affiliate links were used. Read my full disclosure policy here.
In that moment, I made peace with my family—by which I mean that I realized I never wanted to see them again, and I was at peace with that.
The Woman in Me understandably covers a lot of ground, as Britney Spears tells her story on her terms for the first time. The media has also extensively covered aspects of Spears’ memoir, so even if you haven’t read it, you have some idea of what happened. Given this, knowing where to begin my review is difficult. So, I am focusing on the things that struck me most and have stayed with me in the weeks since reading it. I also have a piece coming up in my newsletter, specifically about Britney’s decision to share her abortion experience.
When I was diagnosed with bipolar, Britney Spears was regularly mentioned to me in an ‘Oh, like Britney!’ way. ‘Yes, like Britney!’ I’m pretty sure I replied because, like everyone else, I had absorbed the narrative that Britney having bipolar disorder was the reason for her conservatorship. And while the conservatorship being abusive and bullshit was clear, I never questioned whether Britney had bipolar disorder. The Woman in Me shows that Britney experienced multiple periods of mental ill-health. However, It quickly becomes apparent that they were likely either post-natal depression, post-natal anxiety, or a combination of both rather than bipolar. The upshot of this misdiagnosis is that whatever psychiatric care (and, to be honest, not a lot of it sounded like it was rooted in actually caring for her) Britney received was treating the wrong condition.
It is difficult to untangle Britney’s psychiatric mistreatment from the weaponisation of addiction and forcing her into recovery when it's not at all clear whether addiction was ever truly a problem for her. This ambiguity may be deliberate, especially around using the unnamed energy supplements, and Britney deserves her privacy. It is also possible that the ambiguity is an accurate representation of the fact that, yes, there were times when she leaned on alcohol or drugs more than others that never reached the level of addiction. Britney speaks about finding connections at 12-step meetings (the ones she was forced to attend) that she never felt elsewhere, which is such a tender moment in the book, and it's good that she has positive experiences of this time. But, again, I want to emphasise that she was forced to be there. She wasn’t even allowed to choose which meetings to attend. Her father did. THIS IS NOT HOW 12-STEP PROGRAMMES ARE SUPPOSED TO WORK!!! He used them as another way of controlling Britney's life. He used his alcoholism against her by trotting out the fact alcoholism is in the family, so she has it as well. Which may or may not be true.
If I sound annoyed, it's because I am. I finished The Woman in Me a few weeks ago, and the longer I think about it the more furious I get. None of what Britney was put through is how you should treat mental illness or addiction. I added an expletive-laden comment for every part I highlighted because almost everyone in Britney’s life failed her.
I don't subscribe to the notion that memoir writing is automatically cathartic, but I hope this experience was for Britney. Although, I know The Woman in Me was ghostwritten by Sam Lansky. I am pleased Britney is finally telling us what she was forced to endure. It's important to hear from Britney herself.
The Woman in Me by Britney Spears is published by Gallery Books, an imprint of Simon & Schuster. The Woman in Me is available in hardback, ebook and audiobook formats.
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